


Shade and Video Games

by AzrielWinchester, unit



Series: Detroit Become Human: Trials and Tribulations After the Revolution [3]
Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Gen, Good Friend Tina Chen, Mentioned Connor (Detroit: Become Human), Soft Upgraded Connor | RK900, Tina Chen & Gavin Reed Friendship, Upgraded Connor | RK900 Has Feelings, Upgraded Connor | RK900 Has a Different Name, Video & Computer Games
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-05
Updated: 2020-06-07
Packaged: 2021-03-04 04:13:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,048
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24557479
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AzrielWinchester/pseuds/AzrielWinchester, https://archiveofourown.org/users/unit/pseuds/unit
Summary: Tina and Nines play video games and bitch about Connor. At least that what they started doing, then Nines word vomits feelings all over everything.
Relationships: Tina Chen & Upgraded Connor | RK900
Series: Detroit Become Human: Trials and Tribulations After the Revolution [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1774963
Comments: 5
Kudos: 13





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [unit](https://archiveofourown.org/users/unit/gifts).



> Until unit gets a chance to let me name them as the co-creator of this it's a gift for them!

"Hello Tina. You said to bring salsa. Why?"

"You can't have 'ultimate bad for you nachos' without salsa and since I forgot to hit the market before switching to pajama pants that left you, my friend, as the provider of all things tangy and awesome."

"Sixty said I should bring the mango flavor. So I got that and the habanero flavor. What game are we slaughtering today?" Nines kicked his shoes off by the door and handed Tina the reusable grocery bag with the salsa in it.

A few steps to the right and Tina's depositing the bag, wholesale, onto the counter by the sink then turning towards the fridge to pull a platter of ingredients from the shelf she'd prepared earlier. 

"I picked the latest zombie shooter I saw on the new releases list so don't blame me, entirely, if it's shitty and we have to switch out." 

Chips, heated cheese, and a handful of the chopped ingredients went into a large bowl, layered to cover everything, then the mango salsa was pulled out and topped generously on top. 

Tina left everything on the counter but the bowl and dug out a spoon from one of the drawers before heading towards the livingroom. 

"I got a few thirium sodas and those new fruit slice-things if the nachos aren't that good but otherwise, dig in!"

"Thank you. Do you still have the takis I brought last time or did Gavin eat them all? That's fine, if nothing else we can try befriending ganondorf in botw2 again. Hey did you figure out that co-op puzzle in the last dungeon we tackled?" Nines dug around Tina's cabinets and turned on Tina's spotify Playlist.

Walt abandoned his perch on the cat tree near the couch and wandered towards the kitchen to harass the android's pants in his never ending pursuit to get his cat hair everywhere and claim Tina's guests as his own. He was an asshole but an adorable one. 

"If any of them survived," she called back. "They're either in the second drawer buried under the veggies but at this point I'd call them gone like the wind; we both know food doesn't last in this household." 

Not all were sacrifices to the gods that ruled Gavin's stomach either but Tina would blame him every day of the week and twice on Sunday regardless. 

"I'll be honest, I looked up a guide and cheesed through it because that shit was annoying and I never want to do it again. Also, tell me why your robo-brain couldn't figure it out and beat it for me?"

"Walt, I adore you but if I go home with your fur on my pants again JoJo is going to demand that I bring her with me and I'm not sure that Bu and Mo would like me for that. Why would you put my chips in your vegetable draw? I suppose that I'll have to make do with the sea salt flavored chips in the cabinet by the fridge. I beat it on the xbox, but Sixty's too stingy to get the newest Nintendo switch. The controls are too different." Nines grabbed the chips and picked up Walt. He dropped the cat on the back of the couch and plopped down next to Tina. "Connor was giving me shit at work yesterday about something small and stupid. Did Gavin piss him off again?" Nines knows that he sounds like a child, but at the moment he didn't care.

"Because if they don't go in the drawer of the forbidden then they get eaten." 

It's a dangerous game you play if you leave food in her house. One of these days Nines will figure out the rules but until then it was entertaining to baffle him with often inane logic. 

She waited until he was settled then leaned over to bump their shoulders together. 

"You realize you make money too and can therefore buy your own, right? Or is this some ploy to let you borrow mine so you don't have to?" 

A moment was spared to grimace then shove a few chips into her mouth and lick the excess cheese and salsa from her fingers. 

"We both also know that all it takes to piss Connor off is for Gavin to breathe in his general direction and vice versa. They're idiots. Connor, though...seems to be on a shorter fuse these days and that's saying something since Gavin is the King of short fuses. What's up with that?"

"Sixty won't let me even contemplate getting another game system until his fucking ancient xbox 1 dies of natural causes. The system is over 20 years old!" Nines eyes the chip dip bowl and wondered if Tina would yell at him for drinking the dip straight from the bowl. "Connor's got some undercover OP going on with Gavin and they can't talk about it with anyone but each other until it's over. That's supposedly what they're doing today. If you want my honest opinion, I think Connor needs to get laid and he and Gavin are hate fucking at Gavin's place." The bit is bitter and petty, but that's why he was talking to Tina and not Simon.

"He's a loser that should join this century already! Be brave, shove spaghetti into the disc drive. Get you that new console." 

Seriously, an Xbox One. Even the oldest androids had more advanced technology and capability than that old thing. Sixty should be ashamed of himself for hanging onto a relic like that even if Tina was pretty sure that he was just doing it to be a little shit at this point. 

"Who the hell pulled those two for an undercover gig? Vice hates using androids because they're so easily spotted outside of places specifically known for their 'services'. Gavin, though, I can see him fitting into something down and dirty and he's always ready, willing, and able to throw hands if need be." 

When it came to androids, lineage, and the pursuit of love and family, it was a tricky business. Hundreds of thousands of people sharing your face was just odd to humans and to have them show interest or even have established relationships between them tended to skeeve a lot of people out. Tina used to be among them. 

These days she gets the differences and wishes them the poor bastards the best of luck. 

"You mean laid by someone other than Gavin since they're "hate fucking at Gavin's place"? 

She didn't think luck was going to do anyone in this situation much good if some don't pull their heads out of their asses. But what does she know? She hasn't had a steady relationship going on five years. 

"Or do you mean you'd like to fuck the attitude out of him so he'll stop being an asshole to you and your partner at work?"

"You gave him the damn thing! How am I supposed to do that? He locks it in his room when it's not in use. Allen pulled them for it, something about a high class gig and because I don't have negotiation protocols Connor's the obvious choice. They're undercover as rich mafia brat and his Android bodyguard/boyfriend. So no They, Connor and Gavin, are the ones fucking at Gavin's place. We've been over this T, neither Connor nor Gavin would look at me as a romantic or sexual partner in this lifetime." And now Tina's going to give him  **_The Look_ ** . He reaches to pick up the chip dip bowl to drown his sorrows.

"Uh huh, not going to touch on the fact that you're a highly specialized military prototype that has since adapted to police work and has, I know for a fact, learned how to subtly gain entry through previously locked entryways." She will, however, be  **_that bitch_ ** . 

The cushions are firm beneath her but squish and give when she redistributes her weight to pull a leg up and fold it close so she can turn towards her friend. She doesn't judge him, per se, but they've had this particular argument enough times that it could be held by rote and neither would miss a beat. It's tiresome and frustrating but Tina figured it was doubly so for the big lug currently moping in her apartment. 

"That's bullshit. I mean, okay, I don't know Connor well enough to be a hundred percent on but Gavin? My best friend is a lot of things and several of them aren't complimentary of his character but he is not exactly as sneaky as he thinks he is when he's taken a shine to someone. And you're that someone, just so you know. That boy wants to have your android babies."

Nines gave his most favorite woman in the world a look that spoke of his disbelief, even as he tried to subtly sneak the nachos into his lap. He decides to entertain Tina's opinion for a moment. "Okay say Gavin really does want to be with me, that still leaves his and Connor's nebulous relationship that neither are fessing up to any time soon because they think that all they can get from each other is really aggressively romantic hate sex." Success! Now to see if he could drink half of it without Tina stopping him.

"Honestly, I'm not seeing that as the kind of obstacle you seem to think it is. So what if they're banging it out? That's not a relationship, there's no claim on either of them, and if they're not going to try for something more than hate fucking then that's not your problem. 

Look, if you make it clear that you actually want more than a one night stand or a standing invitation to fuck the tension out of a room then he's going to jump at the chance to be with you because it's something he  _ wants _ . He wants a relationship. He wants the sappy sweet nothings and hand holding, and couch cuddles. But you're going to have to be the one to approach him about it and make it clear it's something you want because he is, and I say this with all the love in my heart, a  _ disaster _ ." 

No, that wouldn't be the problem that would crop up. It'd most likely be the fact that tall, dark, and moody wasn't just pining after her best friend. Nines had a serious heart-on for his bitchier not-twin who was being especially stubborn these days. It most definitely wasn't helping matters that his two shiny pennies were off playing pretend lovers for an OP that he wasn't read in on and probably wouldn't be getting anything but scuttlebutt scraps on until it ended. So his outlet is either suffering in silence or getting catty on her couch. 

And stealing her nachos apparently. She'd allow that. For now. 

"Shoot your shot."

Nines quickly lifted the bowl up and  **_drank a quarter of the nacho sauce_ ** . He was aggressively chewing the chips that he'd stuffed into his mouth just before desecrating Tina's nachos, while he picked up his controller and proceeded to annihilate the game's preset high score.


	2. C2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More manpain from Nines and now Tina's own crush is revealed!

Denial was something that she was intimately familiar with. She lived in it for a long time and not just over whether or not androids were alive. It usually took time and a willingness for reflection to work passed it and right now she didn't expect Nines to be quite ready for that. 

Tina resettled herself to face towards the screen and watched her friend decimate the denizens of some post-apocalyptic hellscape - which looked like a bloodier version of Jersey to her - chewing through hundreds of rounds of various ammunitions and pent up frustrations. It was a little awe inspiring, really, but also intimidating; she never wanted Nines to have any kind of strong negative feelings towards her thank you very much. 

It was also a deflection. And she got that. Truly she did. He didn't want to continue talking about his feelings, maybe didn't want to give in to some wild hope that he kept locked in that pump of his over the possibility of actually getting his man? Or maybe he was just a giant ass babyman more willing to bitch and moan about his nonexistent love life than put himself out there. 

Rejection sucked, though, so, really, she didn't really blame him for being...well, this. 

With the final score flashing on the screen Tina finally tore her gaze away to stare at him. 

"You do realize you're making me more nachos, right? And fuck you very much for ripping right through the game without giving me a chance." 

She let loose a swift punch to his shoulder before swiping the controller from his hands. 

"Oh and while you're at it, stop being a pussy and talk to me about your feelings, jackass! I'm here for you! Talk to Mama T, she is here to help you with your woes."

Nines gave her a vaguely ashamed look after she swiped the controller. But got up to prepare her nachos, giving into her demand to actually verbalize his.... feelings. "After bitching at me about Gavin for twenty minutes, Connor invited me over to his house this weekend. And that set Hank off mumbling something about bread for the next five minutes after that and then Gavin asked me about going to the movies because they just released a new Venom movie. And then they started aggressively flirting in front of me!" He looked down at the cheese that he'd been shredding and realized that he'd shredded too much... again.

The game is just vibrant and gore filled as it had been when Nines was at the controls but somehow it seemed less intense when played at human speeds. There was still chaos and creeping corpses lurking in the corners and crawling out of the woodworks to eat her character's face off however they seemed a lot more menacing since she didn't have an android's superhuman reaction times. 

Her first death drew out a put upon sigh and restart at the last checkpoint she'd cleared. 

"Connor invited you to his house to what? Hang out? And then Gavin asked you out to the movies with him? To see a Venom movie?" 

Okay so she might be being a little heavy handed here but that was hilariously obvious to her a dumb beat cop and yet completely missed by the supermodel from Cyberlife that had a computer for a brain.

"And then they started flirting aggressively in front of me. Chris has a video, you can ask him to send it to you, he thought it was hilarious." Nines just decided to double everything to compensate for his aggressive cheese shredding. "Hank looked mortified the entire time.

A grin stretches wide across her face at the thought of the old lush having to sit through that but it's quickly wiped away by Nines' continued obtuseness. Frustrated didn't even begin to describe how she was feeling. She had to let that go and did with a forceful expulsion of breath. 

"You ever stop to think about how you got invited to do something after work, and on the weekend no less, by the two guys you happen to be lusting over? Or the fact that it happened one after the other before they got intense with each other? 

Maybe, and hear me out here, but maybe they might have been competing to see who you'd pick?"

"How does that work if they ignored the fact they invited me to something with them on separate days? Connor wants me to come over Friday evening and Gavin wants to go to the Saturday midnight showing. Apparently my Sunday belongs to you, because Sixty bought us tickets to see that Mongolian band we like in the Detroit football stadium." Nines grabbed the now finished nachos and moved to sit back down next to his friend.

"Hey, you didn't let drop that this happened on separate days, double-o dumbass. I'm working with what was given to me but my point still stands. 

This isn't happening in a vacuum and they're both legitimately good at their jobs so picking up what's been put down isn't hard. Hell, everyone at Central is feeling the tension and choking on the UST." 

Granted the majority were more interested in having the air cleared rather than a positive resolution. Some were making bets and talking fallout but those were the chuckleheads from swing that didn't know any better and better keep well out of ear range if they knew what was good for them. 

"Look at the facts, babe. Those two both want to spend time with you. Alone. And if that doesn't turn some bulbs on in that big ol' head of yours I don't know what else is going to flip the switch. " 

Oh she had ideas of course but she needed a solid night with Gavin and maybe Connor to suss details and get some solid answers from the pair of them because, dammit, she wanted these idiots to be happy but more than that she wanted her friends to stop dancing around and hurting themselves with self-doubt. 

"Excuse you both but where the hell is my ticket? Not that I got time off to hit up a concert but it's the thought that would have totally counted!"

The Captain has given both of us that night off and I'm picking you up at 6PM Sunday, you'll get your ticket then. I.... I'm.... I want all three of us together and happy, and that's not exactly possible when Connor and Gavin refuse to have even one civil conversation with each other that doesn't involve deciding whether they want to egg all of the SVU cruisers or not because the SVU lieutenant keeps flirting with Hank and it's making him uncomfortable. Health pack to your left." Nines put the nachos on the coffee table and sat back.

"You tell me this  _ now _ when I don't have time to pick out an outfit and look my damn best?! Ass."

The character on screen veers to the left and clips the edge of a wall leading into side street that is pockmarked with craters from explosions and wayward bullets and littered with gory chunks of human and animal bodies alike. The health pack is quickly grabbed and Tina turns, presses and holds the buttons necessary to get the character running again. 

"An ass I'm considering forgiving because I definitely needed that pack." 

It's not really either of their places to really step in and fix the problems between Connor and Gavin yet Tina's about ready to ask Sixty to help her stuff all three of them into one of the unused cells in the basement and throw them lube and a first aid kit as needed until they work their shit out. It won't solve much but it might get them to fucking talk it out like adults. 

Actually that might do more harm than good. Huh. 

"If Hank's that upset by the flirting and doesn't want it to happen he's a big boy and can stand up for himself or he can do the smart thing and go to Fowler over it. Those SVU schmucks shouldn't even be near our floor to begin with. As for Connor and Gavin...they're assholes. This is something we know and love about them. Something you know and love about them, don't deny. But that doesn't mean you gotta sit around and listen to their catfights or that you shouldn't reach over and smash their heads together to get them to cut it out. Also,  _ talking _ to them about it might work too. Ever think of trying that?"

I think Sixty's had this planned for a while, there's a dress for you in my closet that I can bring you tomorrow. He's already gone to Fowler about it, she thinks that because she's the commissioner's daughter Fowler can't tell her what to do. Yes I do adore their asshole tendencies, and Tina you were there the last time I tried to talk to them about the three of us going on a date together. And I quote  **_'Nope, nope, nope, nope, we are never ever attempting that again Nines, they almost ripped your stupid pretty face off! If you have no face who's supposed to be my wingman at the bar! Gavin just growls at them and then no one wants to talk to me!'_ ** End quote." Nines knows that Tina hates it when he uses his voice modulator to mimic her voice and thus tries not to do it very often.

If she hadn't of been in a tense fight with a pack of feral zombies, fighting for her character's life, Tina had half a mind to kick out at Nines' legs. 

_ F r u s t r a t i n g. _

"I get that and I stand by what I said then but this is getting ridiculous and sad, Nines.  **Sad** . I also stand by what I've said tonight. Gavin is into you. Connor seems to be into you too but more assholish about it. Talk to Gavin. Hell, I'll invite you over during our bitch night if that's what it takes or even lure him in with promises of an open tab at that dive bar we all like. Because, baby, something's got to give before one or all of you break."

"I know T. Jump right there's a shortcut that way that's zombie free it's got health packs and a grenade launcher." Nines grabbed one of Tina's couch pillows to snuggle. "Let's try the bar option first, I don't want to impede on the sacred 'bitch night' with him if I don't have to. I'll try to get the ball rolling with Connor on Friday. Happy now that I've given my solemn vow Mistress?"

There benefits far outweigh the downsides to playing video games with an android and Tina happily cultivates the former while waving away the latter because she sure as hell didn't see any hint of a shortcut and most likely would have ended up a smear of blood and trailing body parts before she reached the end of the level without it. 

With her character safely jumping the line between zombie chow and smooth sailing, she chances looking over to smirk at the android beside her. 

"You would be so lucky to wear my collar, pet. But, really, you know I don't mind you hanging out and you'd never be an interloper on my nights hanging with the bestie because you're my friend and you're definitely more than that with Gavin. I will, however, concede that maybe a bar night might be better for that conversation since it's a lot more open and not weighed down by expectation."

Nines felt his face explode into a dark indigo at the mere idea of wearing  **_anyone's_ ** collar. Tina knew about his less than dominant nature in the bedroom in theory only, but that didn't stop her from teasing him about it. "So besides bitching about my love life, how are things going between you and the cute bartender chick from last week?"

The end level score flashes on the screen after the protagonist makes it to the safe zone which would transition into the next level. It's significantly lower than the ones Nines had earned but for Tina's first complete run it's decent enough to earn a whoop and hands raised in the air to celebrate the victory. 

She lets the game idle as she places the controller in the space between their thighs and leans back heavily against the couch's overstuffed backing. 

"Yeah, that didn't go quite where I'd have liked but she's cool. We won't be hitting up the nightlife and kissing in dark booths but I did get her number and we may hang out at a coffee shop or something to shoot the shit. Story of my life."

"Not mentally your type or did you kiss her and think about kissing Sixty when he's not drunk off his ass?" Nines knew it was a bitch move, but figured that he'd earned it.

Tina went still against the cushion and panned her startled eyes towards the ceiling to avoid looking at him. He didn't necessarily hit the nail on the head, it was close enough to have her body feeling like it was breaking out in a cold sweat. 

"We didn't exactly progress to kissing but there was some touching involved before both of us agreed we weren't really feeling it. "

She laughed nervously then cleared her throat and made a better effort to sound amused than she felt. 

"You also promised we wouldn't talk about that spectacularly embarrassing lapse in judgement."

Nines let his head drop to her shoulder and confessed, "Sixty brought it up two days ago. We're both really terrible at telling the people we like that they are special to us, aren't we T? If I can score an actual date with Gavin and/or Connor, will you ask Sixty on one?" The apartment lights chose that moment to go off, signaling that Bu and Mo were hungry.

The lights flicking off was just par for the course for the way this night was unfolding. The flicking of the television kept the living room from being completely darkened but it only added to the mood. 

Tina wriggled closer to Nines, trying not to dislodge his head, and snaked her arm around his arm, squeezing it tight. 

"This hinges completely on you actually talking to either one or the both of them and securing a date. Like an actual date, right?"

"Yes, like me taking Gavin to a roller derby and then dinner at that Italian restaurant he secretly loves. Or me taking Connor to see Wicked and then going for a romantic walk in the moonlight. Or taking both of them stargazing and falling asleep in the bed of Sixty's truck because we borrowed it for the evening." He had thought long and hard about what dates to go with.

"Yes, like that. Like any of those. But until that actually  _ happens _ I'm not doing anything but being your agony aunt and living vicariously through TV romances."

"Alright. How much do you want to bet that Hank is drunk at Fowler's house?"


	3. C3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nines and Tina wind down for the night.

"Ha! Sucker's bet." 

It was no secret that their Captain and Lieutenant have been best friends for years, decades even, and even less of one that Hank's drinking problem wasn't exactly curbed no matter if he was doing better these days. It was no stretch of the imagination to think that Hank would be over at Fowler's house if Connor wasn't home to keep him company, especially if he was being particularly chummy. 

"Wonder if they're having their own bitch night? It'd be a great time for him to talk to his pal Jeffery about the creep from SVU."

"Most definitely. Except I think theirs involves more hockey and bad decisions. You remember that one time the Captain came in like two hours late and limping? Hank was on time and cordial all day." Nines knew that Tina was going to punch him for that one.

O-oh. That was rude and wrong, and not something that Tina needed in her head. Those two men were not only old enough to be her parents but were also her bosses! She didn't need to have an image of them getting down and dirty playing in the background every time she thought about them at all. 

"Fuck you, Nines. Just - gah - why did you have to put that in my head?!" 

But it made a kind of sense, in a way, why the Captain was so lenient with Anderson's behavior both past and present, and so blase about the man's drinking problem. 

Still, it wasn't something she wanted to think about it. Nope. No old men fucking like bunnies in front of the television. 

Jesus fuck.

"God, I hate you so much right now."

Nines fell off the couch he was laughing so hard. "I'm sorry Tina, but I've seen pictures of Hank's late wife, guess who he was married to?" Nines was glad that she hadn't punched him yet.

She followed his downward momentum and flopped in the empty space he left behind. A hand slapped at the android's heaving chest and shoulder. 

"When has this information ever been something I have sought out? Tell me anyway, babyboy."

"Amanda Stern. Elijah Kamski's beloved mentor. How's that for a small world?"

That was a bombshell if ever there was one because what the actual fuck?! 

Elijah Kamski's life was pretty much plastered all over the place and throughout so many publications back when Cyberlife started to make waves in the tech sector that anyone who had a working brain glommed up tidbits if not the whole monty regarding who he was, who he associated with, and who helped guide him towards his full potential as an inventor and innovator. 

Amanda Stern was on the top of that list. To know that the Lieutenant had a deeper, more intimate connection to someone so influential was mindboggling and sparked a curiosity so intense it might as well have been a literal lightbulb shining inside her skull. 

However, Tina was quick to snuff that out. Anderson's life was a mess for as long as she'd known the man and he further mucked it and several others up with his shitty decisions and spiral into alcoholism. And he tended to snap like a rabid dog whenever brought up anything about his life outside of the precinct. 

Sure, he was getting better and tended to be more of an overgrown teddy bear but she couldn't and wouldn't forget how intimidating he was when his hackles were up and he was spitting venom at whoever pissed him off. 

Besides, how much would he appreciate his underlings knowing something he didn't want to share? Or she assumed he didn't want to share that since he didn't have pictures up at his desk of his late wife. He didn't have pictures of his late son up either. 

It made her wonder just how much of the man's previous anger towards androids was really all about the one that failed to save his kid...

"That man has the shittiest of luck. Do you think Kamski knew and that's why he was such a fucking prick when Conman and Anderson went looking for answers back in that November?"

"Gavin says that Kamski definitely knew. But he thinks that Elijah's behavior was more akin to child sulking because their favorite toy taken away. Apparently the RK line is his personal pet project." Nines thought about the man's indignation on his and Sixty's behalf. "He's very attached to us as a whole."

"Pet project ten years after he was booted from the company? Seems fake but okay." 

That always seemed an odd point of contention being thrown around. Gavin had mentioned it a few times and she's heard it from various others, including Nines, but it never made a lot of sense unless Kamski had his fingers still in Cyberlife's pie and if that was the case the man was a lot more scummy than she thought. 

"You're not toys and you're definitely not his. I've got more claim on you than that guy...but he definitely has more money to take care of your nacho habit."

"Cyberlife illegally seized both the RK800s and the RK900s from him about threeish years ago. The same year that Cole died....." Now that Nines was thinking about it why would Cyberlife create an Android that was custom tailored to Hank? Unless Connor was going to be a gift for him like Markus was for Carl.

"That doesn't jive well with what Cyberlife said about Connor's development but I'd more believe that they're lying than them having a ready built twunk investigator model all ready to be deployed all over the country right after a little trial run where deviancy just happens to be sparking hottest." 

Which also brought up some uncomfortable questions about Cyberlife's ties to the military and RK900 line that was supposed to fill their ranks. 

It didn't matter so much anymore, though, since androids were free beings now and Cyberlife was in better hands these days. 

"Fuck'em. You're ours now and everyone else can suck an egg."

Nines laughed at her crass but true statement. He grinned brightly at her, showing off the fangs that he often hid out of self-consciousness. "I'm glad that I belong to you guys. It's never boring. Speaking of Cyberlife and better hands, how are you enjoying teaching a bunch of PLs how to kickbox? Simon told me that North says that your students adore you."

"It will never cease to amaze me how advanced you androids are, built strong, tough, flexible, and with the capacity to learn that is, frankly, scary as fuck yet can be so terribly clumsy and uncoordinated when it comes to fighting." 

She loved their students, she really did, but they were hilariously bad at fighting. Or, well, terrible at first. They took direction really well and it didn't take them long to pick up techniques and proper stance and strikes, but those first few lessons were filled with accidents and falls with some dislocated fingers and joints. 

"They're coming along though. Won't be long before they're out there defending themselves effectively and possibly helping to teach more androids that wanna learn."

"Do you think that I should try to trick Connor into joining the group therapy afterwards or is his martyr-complex too strong?" Nines had to ask her, because Simon just got  _ snippy _ when he talked about Connor.

Tina smacked at him again, this time harder. 

"Tricking someone into therapy is a dick move. But I think some therapy would do him some good because that boy has issues. You all do. Is Sixty going to it or did he find his own therapist? For that matter, have you?"

"Sixty is joining North's meditation group. I'm going to see if I can't get an appointment with Lucy on Saturday before I watch Venom with Gavin. North doesn't want a conflict of interest with anyone in the therapy group. It's partially why she and Markus are fighting.... again. She was crying to Josh the last time Simon and I had a day in. It was the day before I came to work with the silver eyeshadow and black wingliner." Gavin and Connor had both stared at him strangely all day. Gavin had been staring so hard that he'd walked into a wall and knocked himself out. Needless to say Nines had since not gone to work in any makeup no matter how pretty it made him feel.

Honestly, Sixty didn't seem the type for meditation so it was a little odd to think the guy was peacing it up with North. If he was, though, good for him. Bad for North because the bitch didn't tell her! But good for him. 

"Isn't she usually booked solid? Hopefully you'll get a slot because I heard she's really good."

Hooboy, the makeup incident. 

She only heard talk about that because she'd, unfortunately, been stuck out on patrol and then kept on scene as crowd control most of that day. Gavin gave her the deets but the man refuted any claim that he had photographic evidence and since it didn't make its way in their private group chat or his insta she tended to believe he hadn't gotten a sneaky snap. 

"You know we're going to have to have a glam night at some point. I can't do eyeshadow for shit but I'm an ace at couture and your cheekbones were made for it."

"Not on a work night Gavin injured himself last time, because he was staring so hard." Nines sulked, he'd been trying to be pretty and Connor and Gavin had both acted like he'd committed a crime. "And thank you for the compliment. I'll do your eyeshadow."

"Maybe you can come over early on Sunday and we can get prettied up before the concert?" 

It's asked innocently enough, she thinks. No ulterior motives or anything. Nope! 

"Thanks. I've got tons of makeup packed in a case underneath my sink we can break out and play with so don't worry about bringing anything unless you got some specific colors you want to use."

"You mean it!" Nines is eager to be pretty again, he hasn't had the courage to touch the cheap little set that he'd snuck off to buy during a stakeout with Gavin. "Silver and pink, I want to be cute for a night!" Nines gave Tina another fangy grin. Two! In one night!

Tina smiled down at him, delighted in how something so simple made her friend light up like a Christmas tree. 

"I'm Asian, so half my palettes have soft tones and highlights so you bet your plasteel ass that there's silver and pink mixed in there somewhere. All you need to do is make sure you've got something snazzy to wear that matches. Me? I'll have to wait to see what cute little number Sixty went out and got me...and don't think for a second I'm not going to interrogate the fuck out of that dumbass about that because what the fuck?! But, yeah! It'll be fun."

"I'm going to wear that sweater that I brought with you the other day, the one you yelled at me for." Nines was just happy that he was going to get to really dress up. "Sixty scanned you the last time we all got together as a group."

"You RKs have got to stop scanning your friends without permission or at least stop admitting to doing it." 

It was a little creepy. Okay, a lot creepy but most the time it was done benignly; health checks, injury checks, things like that. Scanning a body to get measurements so they can be used to get a properly sized dress for a friend? 

Creepy yet thoughtful. Tina's undecided, to be honest. 

"As long as it's not just that sweater I won't scream at you again."

"I'm not Simon got me shorts with built in thigh garters and some cute mesh nylons to go with! He kept telling me not to let North or Connor see them. And Gavin and I went boots shopping!" Nines knew that his inability to feel shame in most aspects of his life was often a point of contention between his friends.

"What I'm getting out of this is that you're a real slut and Simon needs to take me shopping for weekend bootycall outfits." 

She softened the blow of her comment with a quick pinch to the nearest cheek should could reach followed up by a soft pat. 

"You're going to look amazing and I'm already jealous." 

Tina wriggled a little, bending at her waist and half off the couch, to get a hand around one of Nines' legs and went to lift it. 

"Boots with or without heels because you are already a mountain, okay? Like legitimately scraping the clouds. How much taller are you planning to be?!"

"Just an inch. Gavin said that anything else would get me raped. Besides you're going to be wearing your shiny strappy heels so there's not going to be much height difference." Nines allowed Tina to manhandle him, slipping into that happy headspace that only she seemed able to coax him into.

Imagining Nines an inch taller in that sweater she nearly brained him over because catty-gorgeous doesn't even begin to describe it was easy enough but adding another inch to his already indecent height had her agreeing that he'd be an absolute feast for any horn dogs looking to eat out. 

Though thinking about Nines putting someone through a wall because they tried to get frisky without permission was sending her into peals of delight. 

Tina shook his leg then let him straighten it back out on the floor. 

"I bet they're shitkickers. He's got such a thing for those things and I don't even blame him. Bet you look amazing in them."

Nines hummed and smiled lazily at Tina. Thinking of what I would do to someone who gets fresh with me? The boots have lots of chains on them." Nines stretched and rolled over.

"Kinky." 

It probably wouldn't take much convincing to let her snap a few dozen photos before they go out, right? Maybe. He was going to look devastating and it would be just the thing to tease her best friend with. 

Well, she would if she didn't think Nines would shatter her spine in retaliation. 

Probably worth it. 

"Gavin probably thought a lot of impure thoughts about you and those boots because I know I sure am. You're completely unfair, the lot of you RKs. Thank god you're my friend or I'd be jealous."

"Is that why he was staring vacantly into space for five minutes when I showed him that picture that you took of me sitting on your couch in my sweater? I'm sure Sixty will check all your boxes. He's a bratty subby bitch. And he's only a couple of inches taller than you." Nines pushed himself up to sit with his back against the couch and grabbed the controller and wirelessly saved the game, then he switched over to botw. He still has 60 shrines to go 100% completion of the game. Tina could bitch at him later.

"Proof. You have had proof of this man's want for you and yet you've been thinking that he doesn't like you or would date you."

She refused to give up her sprawl but did scooch down towards the lounger to give him plenty of room to sprawl comfortably. 

"Both excellent qualities that I do deeply enjoy. Helps, too, that he's cute as hell. However, Mr. Matchmaker, that's neither here nor there since we've known each other this long and nothing's sparked." 

She sighed and waved a hand in a circular motion as if to clear the air.

"I'll forever be loveless and have to live vicariously through your love life so get crackin' on pulling my idiot best friend and your idiot predecessor. Also, buddy, break the Xbox and get the new switch already. What's the worst Sixty'll do? Whine? Screech? Toss you out a window? Pft, he'll get over it and finally join this decade."

Nines had just attempted to make a jump in one of the shrines only to end up yeeting himself into empty space. "T, he buys you clothes. He sent you  **_six fucking dozen sunflowers_ ** , because he knows you hate roses. He took you on a spa retreat with him for a  **_week_ ** ! Tina, he's been courting like a gentleman for  **_months_ ** !" Nines loved Tina and his brother, but this denial was more ridiculous than  _ his _ love life.

There was an immediate urge to deny that. She even opened her mouth to emit the denial but closed it sharply in embarrassed frustration.

There was physical evidence of courting behavior and Sixty was pretty nice to her but that didn't mean anything! They were friends and friends acted friendly all the damn time! Besides, if there was something more going to happen you'd think that the guy would just approach her like an adult and not employ the same —

Fucking hell. 

Sixty was just as much of an idiot as Gavin and Connor and she was a dumbass for not seeing it sooner. 

"Shut up and go conquer those shrines and leave me to wallow in my stupidity."

Nines laughed even as Link decided to try and fly once again. "You help get mine and I'll help you get yours?"

"No. You're on your own. I'm going to die in a hole of dug by my shame." She whined, pressing her face into the fabric of the couch cushion.

Nines finally made it to the end of the shrine and handed Tina the controller so that she could release some of her pent up tension on henox or two.

There was only so much beating around Bokoblins and White-maned Lynels before even the satisfaction of sending them off to meet their makers lost all appeal. It did help loosen the ball of anxiety and regret in her stomach though so there was that. Eventually she just handed the controller back over and rolled onto her back to stare at the ceiling. 

"We are the  _ worst _ and I don't understand how we made it this far in life. But okay. I'll help you bag Gavin. I mean, I was already going to do that but now we can go even stevens because I really, really, really want to kiss Sixty's stupid face."

"Sheer dumb luck?" Nines guessed. 

"To be fair he really wants to kiss you too, but every time he even thinks about doing it sober he has a panic attack about you just simply being attracted to RK800s. I have to remind him that you are actively helping me try and date Connor. It doesn't seem to help, so you'll probably still have to deal with gentleman's courtship until he's a little bit further into his meditation class." That had been Sixty's primary objective in joining the class, asking one Tina Chen on a date.

Nines shrugged, glad that Gavin made a point to take his expensive alcohol home with him when leaving Tina's. "He drinks less than I do. Which.... isn't saying alot because I drink like a fucking fish. But that's better than he was a month ago, I think he and Hank go to the same AA group. The humans keep trying to tell him that since he can't get a hangover he's not really an alcoholic. Which is stupid." Nines grumbled and tweeted Link across another chasm. "Did you hear when Gavin called me a couple of days ago?"

"To be fair, and you know how much I hate being fair to supposed professionals that should know better, androids and alcoholism isn't something anyone would have thought would go together. They're probably not trained how to address it. 

But I'm betting everyone who has given him shit are just assholes still laboring under the delusion that you guys aren't really alive and can experience authentic human emotions or experiences themselves like getting drunk or eating nachos despite the proof literally being advertised on television, billboards, and wherever else companies can wedge in an ad or two." 

Or they could literally stop being shitheads and show the same kind of understanding, acceptance, and support to another person who wanted help overcoming an addiction they all suffered with. 

Tina took a gulp of soda and sighed. Some people were just assholes and there was nothing anyone could do to change that. She was just sorry that Sixty had to deal with them, especially since he was trying. 

"I did not and am now demanding to be informed of said phone call."

"Okay so I was at home with Sixty when Gavin called me and when I answered, I put him on speakerphone, he's yelling and you can tell that he's totally smashed. I hear Connor in the background asking if he's called for pick up yet and do you know what Gavin says?" Nines knew that he was being dramatic but Tina liked dramatic.

"I'm going to go out on a limb with an educated guess that it was a thoroughly, disgustingly cheesy pick-up line or flirtation that made both you and everyone else around to cringe and the ugly laugh?"

"He called me a sexy playstation 5! Sixty nearly brained himself on the coffee table, he was laughing that hard! I was dying at how cute he sounded slurring it at me."

Yep. That was her idiot best friend to a tee. The man was a happy drunk and thought he was hilarious. Admittedly he was but his humor took a sharp nosedive once his brain cells were fermenting. Tina was actually surprised it wasn't worse. 

"Well, you do rock the black and white motif that Sony adopted for their white series productions so that was a compliment of the highest caliber his drunk ass could come up with." She grinned and snuggled up against his side. "He thinks you're  _ preeeeeeeeeeeety _ ."

And there went Link screaming into the void once more. "How are you so much better at this game than I am? I'm pretty sure that he said that you were prettier than Kono from the 2010's adaptation of Hawaii 5-0 one time." Nines could never keep up with Gavin's brain when he was drunk.

"The man is gayer than a jaybird but he has excellent taste in ladies." 

If she preened a little well so what? It was nice to be reminded that her bestie was a sappy sucker who appreciated her. She's returned the favor on a number of occasions but this was an excellent reminder that Gavvy was due some friendly puffing up. 

'Note to self: bestie cuddle session needed." 

"I have no clue because, statistically, you're better at just about everything a human can reasonably do so it makes very little sense that you suck at this. 

But if you'd stop trying to rush to victory and bypass half the steps to get through areas like the cheating cheater you are then you might actually develop the skill to power through. But  _ noooooooo _ , that's to slow."

"I beat the game in fifteen minutes for that YouTube speedrun challenge that got me banned from those. Why'd they ban me and not the other six Androids in the contest?" Nines managed to complete the rito shrine and thought about switching to the Ocarina of Time Master Quest Ultimate Remake Remastered. "Want to throw ourselves into agony with Ocarina of Time, again?" Both he and Tina tended to ugly cry by the end of that game.

"I hope you aren't looking for an actual answer from me on that because, buddy, I don't have a damn clue. Mostly because I don't give a shit about speedrunning since I think they're all shitty and shouldn't have any kind of acclaim attached to them." 

Right, so...she's very passionate about not rewarding people for breaking rules and sometimes the entire game itself in order to get it done quickly. It was stupid and shitty and nope. No thank you. 

"Can't we just throw on a sad movie and drown ourselves in nacho sauce and tears instead? It's less brutal."

"But you said that you downloaded the dlc that lets you befriend ganondorf! And I want to see long it takes for that to become an angst fest!" Nines allowed Tina her video game purity views as long as she didn't mess with his Harry Potter dnd campaign and spoil the final villain.

"Again, a sad movie will be less emotionally devastating than traversing a world with characters we know and love and are heavily invested in only to have things get brutally real once again only to then add on top another character we are highly invested in getting torn down, tortured, and tormented for hundreds of lifetimes because fate it bullshit and the world sucks." 

Tina poked at Nines' side. 

"Switch games and I'll go get us some sweet things to gorge ourselves on when the feels hit."

"Have I said that I love you recently T? Because I do." Nines saved and switched the games, all while bouncing a little bit in place.

Tina stood and before manuvering around the coffee table and Nines' long limbs she leaned over to ruffle his hair. 

"All the time but it never hurts to hear it. And for the record I love you too ya giant sweettheart." 

The kitchen wasn't far and for once Walt wasn't darting around her legs and being a general nuisance so it wasn't more than a few second to reach it then a few minutes to rummage around the cupboards to find the stashes of sweets she stocked for just such an occasion. A lot of it was straight up human consumables but there were a few experimental thirium creams and fruit treats, as well as what was supposed to be like a cherry cordial but it looked dubious. Hopefully it tasted just fine. 

Tina made her way back into the living room and got herself comfortable by Nines' side, sitting closer so the large selection of treats she brought back could be shared easily without having to constantly pass things back and forth. 

"I'm warning you now, though, if Gannon doesn't get a happy ending I'm rioting."

"The cordial looks like it's fermented. It's not for human consumption, right? And of course you'll riot, so will I." Nines grabbed one of the fruit treats and started the game.

"Nah, that one is one hundred percent androids only." 

Not that she hadn't been tempted with the  _ forbidden cordial _ but it clearly stated that it was toxic to humans due to the amount of thirium, diluted as it was with other chemicals used in its production.

"I like breathing too much to even chance it."

"So besides everything else that we've talked about tonight, has anything else caught your fancy?" Nines was going to hand her the controller as soon as the deku tree finished babbling about how evil ganondorf was.

A handful of chocolate covered cashews made their way into her mouth and while they were being crunched up and consumed she thought over everything they'd talked about to this point. 

Eventually she shook her head. 

"Unless you wanna revisit the topic of your pitiful pining I think the only thing we got left is objectification. 

I love Gavin and think he's a fine piece of man meat but I don't wanna talk about his pert ass and killer thighs any more than I'm sure you wanna talk about Sixty's. So I think we're good to just enjoy smashing our way through video games, stuffing ourselves with all this glorious junk food, and then wrapping up like burritos and conking out like teenagers in the mess left behind."


End file.
